Seriously Sirius!
by Dea Thaed
Summary: This is a couple years after the end of the war. Sirius doesn't realize it but when he's bored and decided to explore the forbidden dungeons of Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry, he causes the most trouble. Especially when the school decides that there isn't enough magic in the world anymore and fixes it. What is pure magic? Magical entities of course. Ignores most of HBP
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: this is getting old. I do not claim to own anything. I do not get paid. Period

Warning: slash… duh

Summary: this is a couple years after the end of the war. Sirius doesn't realize it but when he's bored and decided to explore the forbidden dungeons of Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry… he causes the most trouble. Especially when said school decides that there isn't enough magic in the world anymore and fixes it. What is pure magic? Magical entities of course. Ignores HBP. Dumbledore is still alive but still follows basic plot of DH. Though ignore the deaths. You all can kiss it.

A/N so I Love tomatoes. Really! I love them. Fresh ones. I'll just eat them up. So please don't throw rotten virtual tomatoes at me that's a waste of a good fruit… vegetable… whichever side of the debate you're on. Idc. I say this because I was threatened with rotten tomatoes the other day, for not updating sooner. Well this is a new story and I get the feeling that I will be updating less…. Bring on the tomatoes… but again… not rotten ones.

Chapter numero Uno

Sirius was bored.

Though for someone who had spent the better part of the peacetime locked in a cell and then the beginning part of the war locked in THAT house, he assumed he was bored enough for one lifetime. Now with the war over, everything had calmed down. Pettigrew's body had been found and he was exonerated. Which obviously helped his boredom just a little bit as he took a year's sabbatical from anything serious and traveled.

But now he was back. And he was bored.

And when Sirius was bored nothing good ever came of it.

Sure after he was done travelling he tried to be an auror, and it worked for a while. Hunting rebel death eaters on the run could be fun. Until there were no more death eaters. After that he spent six months in the muggle world as his animagus form, pulling pranks and such. But it eventually got old and he was back at Grimwauld place.

After cleaning it a couple times, screeching at his mother daily, threatening Kreacher, and taking care of Buckbeak, he was bored again. It was then that Dumbledore decided he was going to keep him occupied. And it worked. He helped Moony with his classes, especially the week before and after the full moon, and pranking the students and staff.

But right now it was summer, specifically the end of summer. Tomorrow the students would be there. And he knew he could go back to having something to do all day. Like replacing the supply of pumpkin juice with a giggle potion, or having peeves help him cause havoc, stalk the hallways at night dressed as Snape and scare the life out of the students. Sneak into his godsons chambers and switch his broom for a trick broom that would become impossible to let go of and go out of control, charm Snapes cauldrons to belched any time an ingredient was added or exorcised the contents onto him when the potion was done, as long as it was harmless that is.

Not like he cared for the greasy git. But Harry seemed to have a coronary the first time he did it and it was new version of the draught of living death that just seeped into the skin. He changed his ways, you would too if you had the most powerful wizard glare at you too. Though he didn't understand why his godson did this at. The greasy git hated him too.

But that was tomorrow. It was no fun doing any of that without the students there.

So back to the topic at hand. Sirius woke up that morning and stared at the red hangings on his four poster bed.

And he was bored.

Swinging his legs over the side and looking out the window that was over the pitch, he decided to get up for the day and see if there would be anything to do. He wore his normal attire and dark striped orb up and equally dark waist coat. Today it was blue though. Pulling on his grey slacks and shoes he thought for the thousandth time, why exactly he dressed this way. His mothers' shrill voice rang through his head about pure bloods this, and images that. It seemed it was so engrained that he didn't even think about anymore. He stood in front of the mirror and decided to leave the dark waves on his head alone, but thought more deeply on his appearance. Sure he looked like a pureblood, acted like one when the occasion called for it. But he shrugged. He liked the way he looked.

Leaving the room he set out to find something to do. His first stop Moony.

"Hey Moony?"

"What Sirius?"Remus was moving things around the history classroom. Setting up displays and making sure everything was just right.

"Are you done with the history lessons yet?"

"Sirius I cannot entertain you right now, go find someone else. Unless you want to help me?"

He was gone a few seconds before the sentence was even out. If there was anything he hated more that boredom it was work. So he left to find his godson, surely he was planning something fun today?

"Hey kiddo." Harry was sitting at his desk, his head hovering over a pile of papers.

"Sirius I do not have anything that will entertain you. go bug Albus." The man pouted for a second but realizing he was going to nothing else out of his godson he left. His shoulders slumped. Surely everyone wouldn't be working?

As he was walking towards the headmasters' office he ran into Hermione. Being literal he was forced to be a gentleman and helped her pick up the immense stack of books she had been carrying.

"Oh thank you Sirius. I'm sorry for running into you. I was just so much of a hurry. We got some new books today and I wanted to get them on the shelves before the students arrived tomorrow."

"Oh no Hermione it is my pleasure to help you. you read them first didn't you." The women blushed before laughing softly.

"Well, they just seemed so interesting. Hey would you like to help me shelve them? I have at least four more stacks I have to get in the library." He blanched at the look of the stack and the thought of four more.

"I'm afraid I have a meeting with the headmaster, if you still require assistance I will not hesitate."

The woman rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"Go Sirius before I force you to help me just under the principles that it will keep you out of trouble."

With a smirk he ran down the hall as quickly as he could. He frowned and lowed as he neared the guardian statue. Was he that predictable?

Before he even said the password the statue opened and Dumbledore stepped out. This morning though the robes he wore put even some of the more eccentric drag queens to shame. The electric blue robes and neon orange and green shooting stars flying all over them. The purple rimming sparkled slightly and matched the pointed hat sitting atop the white head. All in all Sirius had to blink back the tears the threatened to spill as he looked at the aged wizard in front of him.

"Ah this is a good morning isn't it Sirius?"

"Yes Albus it is."

"What do I owe this visit?"

"Well I was hoping…"

The old man looked at him over his spectacles. "That I might have something to occupy you with?"

"Yes." the older man thought for a moment.

"I do not however Severus might."

Sirius looked at the old man for a second before a grin spread across his face. Now that could be fun.

"Thank you headmaster, I'll go see if I could help him out."

The headmaster gave him a knowing, twinkling look before heading into the great hall. Sirius however made his way into the foreboding dungeons. People always warned him not to poke a sleeping bear. But who was he to listen?

He opened the door to the potions classroom as quietly as he could. Well he thought it was quiet but before the handle had even been turned Severus knew he was there. Sirius tried to sneak across the classroom to the man pouring over a boiling cauldron. Tried being the key word.

"Black, I do not have the patience for you this morning. Leave now before you become the next unfortunate volunteer for my next potion."

Sirius may have been considered reckless on several occasions, but he knew never to mess with the potions master when his potions was on the line. Though he thought that it may also have something to do with the last time Sirius had been in the process of 'helping' the potions master out. He had added an ingredient to early that turned the potion from a boil reduction to a boil inducer. The after effect had been amusing and he had had a great laugh. The potion master however made sure that Sirius thought twice before thinking of doing something like that again.

And he left.

He blamed the old man. He knew this was going to happen. Or he was getting old enough to forget that Snivellus hated, being the weakest form of the feeling he could come up with, him.

Standing outside the potions classroom he stared at the grey stone in front of him. He looked to the left and the stairs. Then to the right, where the candles lit up the dark, foreboding passage. A smirk spread across his face.

He could always explore the dungeon. They had never done that. It had always seemed like forbidden territory.

He turned right and started to walk into the maze. Without a map. This could be fun.

~an hour later~

He took it back. This was not fun.

For one; he was lost.

Two; he swore the castle was playing with him. He had been turned around at least four times.

Three; he broke his left hand twenty minutes back when he punched a wall out of frustration.

It was an hour ago that he tried to leave the dungeons. He was so irritated he forgot he was bored. not that it mattered now anyway.

Four; he just tripped on that stone back there. And it was not there before! He thinks he broke a toe on the damn thing.

Five; he had just sworn immediately after. It sounding something like shit! Fuck! Damn! Oh hell!

Six; the castle swallowed him.

He sat on the dusty ground and stared at the hole in the ceiling that had once been the floor he had been walking on. The hole closed up and he stood rubbing his posterior. Again he blamed the old man. If he hadn't sent him into the dungeons this wouldn't have happened in the first place.

He blinked against the sudden light as the room light up. In front of him there were four large pillars; all had glowing orbs all over him.

The muggles would say he had ADD. It was that simple. How else would you explain the compulsion he suddenly had to push every single orb?

Well compulsion was a step short. Because he did push every orb, and was sorely disappointed when nothing happened. Except that the lights went out.

Couldn't it at least get him out of here?

No the only thing that happened was a single orb wedged between two of the pillars blinked on. He would know because it took him two minutes of wiggling and stretching to even push it. That's when it happened.

The room burst into a bright flash and it felt like something forced its way into his mind. Whatever it was it shifted through his memories. Whatever it found it was not happy.

"Magic is dying; I'm going to have to fix this." An image appeared in front of him.* It was a small boy with black hair and blue eyes. He had a large sword strapped to his side.

"Who are you?"

"I am Hogwarts." Now to Sirius this was crazy. Everyone must be playing a prank on him.

"Haha, good one. Okay guys you can let me out now."

"You have activated the fail safe. It was meant to be activated in emergencies."

"What's the emergency then?" he figured play along. They would let him out eventually.

"Magic is slowly dying. I must take immediate action if the magical world does not wish to disappear."

He walked up to the boy and attempted to pat him on the shoulder but his hand fell through. It was then he felt the magic coming from the boy. It was then that he started to get the feeling this was not a prank.

"What action are you going to take?"

"I must renew magic in everyone."

"How are you going to do that?"

"By unlocking magical creature heritage in the people that occupy my space."

Sirius should have known it.

When he was bored nothing good ever came of it.

A/N okay I'm going to end it here. Let me know what you think. This is going to be a Snarry story but this is just how I'm starting it. Now to make things clear it's during the summer and there are a lot more people in the castle right now then just those mentioned. Hogwarts does what she does because in creature heritage there is no half blood you become a full blood magical entity. This is her solution to give the wizarding world new blood and magic. * The boy is a mix of all four founders. A boy because of Hufflepuff. Small boys are loyal to a fault and most often times kinder the younger they are. This boy comes in the image of a four year old. The black hair from Slytherin, the blue eyes from Ravenclaw, and the sword from Gryffindor.

Okay let me know what you think. TTFN.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Hello again, DT here. Here to bring you new and used, and personally overstated, statements of non ownership. Of the onetime offer to state, again, that it is free. No down payment for the rest of life! Thank you for listening to this fanfiction mandatory broadcast. Enjoy your reading and have a wonderful day, morning, afternoon, evening, night… bloody hell! Whatever time it is you decide to interpret fics of the fan variety.

Warning: Danger! Danger! Passing this point means you have read the above, below, and in-between statements written for your convenience and have consented that; yes, you do know that this fic is possibly written by someone that has ingested the more than recommended dose of caffeine and is possibly mad, that yes, you do know that this fic and all fics written by the above mad person are indeed of the slash variety and will possibly contain segments not meant for those under the age of consent. By passing this point you state that the material below will in no way give offense and that you are fully aware that the material will contain very controversial material and you will not hinder the writer by posting any comments or opinions in the flame variety. By passing this point if you, the reader, by chance decide to ignore said warning statements are liable, by fault of your own, to a verbal lashing by said mad author. Thank you and have a wonderful… well you should have gotten the point by now?

A/N Hello again… I already said that… well another chapter another day. I feel in the right mood to write. I hope dearly that you all are enjoying the updates. Yes? No? I wouldn't know. You never review… rectify that situation as soon as you reach the bottom of the page… so long as you actually read the chapter first… Allons-y!

Chapter Deux

Sirius stared dumbly at the apparition a moment before bursting into laughter. The boy ignored him and continued speaking.

"The Grim is a magical creature, a cousin to the werewolf. They are now an omen but it was not always so. It became one by losing its mate. Your families are descendent from the Grim. Every generation has a Grim in form and in luck because a curse was placed on the Grim line. You are a Grim Sirius Orion Black. And now so is your entire family."

The laughter died quickly as Sirius stared in shock at the boy. "But they all can't have the curse. How did you even know about the curse? Werewolf! What did you do to me?" He wanted to slap the boy, castle… whatever it was.

"The curse in your family has been removed this day. And I am magic I know all that happens in my walls. I have also seen into the minds of all that have walked them. I have done nothing to you. It was done to you through your genes. You, like a were, transform; but the Grim was a leader therefore kept their minds. It is not all that different from shifting into your animagus form. But now you have your true form."

Sirius was still panicking. "But if I attack anyone or…"

"You need to listen. It is no longer a curse. And it is not a disease. You cannot spread the gene of your family to others. If you were to have children then they too would have the family gene. As it has always been."

Sirius thought for a moment. He has always known about the curse because… hell he had it. But now… it wasn't a curse. He was a Grim. "What were they before they were cursed?"

"The Grim was a symbol of death from the beginning. But they also are a symbol of warning, protection and life. The living Grim were leaders. They protected. In death their spirits were the ones that guarded the dead and in effect the living by warning them of things to come. There is always a bad to a good just as there is always a good to a bad."

Sirius was confused as to how this affected him. "You are a were. But with the ability to control yourself."

"So I have a mate?"

"Yes. You will likely find them here in the next weeks to come."

"If my mate is a werewolf?" he mentally crossed his fingers. Before thinking more along those lines. Remus was already a magical creature how would this affect him?

"If your mate is a werewolf then genes passed down would be that of the Grim as they are the dominant were gene."

He nodded. "How would this affect someone who is already a werewolf?"

"They will not have two separate beings in them. The wolf will be absorbed by them. They will be in complete control which will make the transformation easier. But some characteristics will change like you will also change. They will be lycan."

This pleased Sirius. In his mind he imagined dancing to beat it though…. Maybe a different muggle song he thought.

"I should let you return. The changes in everyone will happen gradually over the night and you will all need your rest." Sirius opened his mouth to ask another question but when he blinked he was in the front hall. The headmaster smiled at him before motioning to his office.

"Now Sirius how was your trip to the dungeons?" A slight clicking sound accompanied them down the hall.

Sirius looked around the hall in confusion. "…it was… I bet you know exactly what happened! What is that sound?!"

Dumbledore smiled and waved his hand. "Nothing to worry about. I do indeed know what happened but I wish to hear it from you." he looked at him over his glasses as they reached the gargoyle. "You did cause what is going to happen to everyone within the Hogwarts boundaries after all. You do realize that will include Hogsmeade do you not? And if this will take full effect tomorrow night the students as well." He walked up the stairs as Sirius stared after him.

Oh bloody hell…. He ran his hand through his hair. He hadn't thought about any of that. He had only thought of Remus… well hell. He followed up the stairs behind the headmaster. "Albus if you can talk to the castle, why don't you convince him… it to undo this."

"Because I cannot. Not when the failsafe is in regard."

"But it was an accident!"

"Regardless." He shook his head as he took a seat. He fidgeted for a moment before settling for just being uncomfortable.

"Albus are you okay?" He sat across from him and reached for the yellow candy on the desk. Albus slapped his hand away and pulled the bowl towards him.

"You are not the only one to deal with your… inheritance." Sirius stared at him blankly.

"But that would mean…"

"Yes the Dumbledore family does indeed have creature blood it has been suppressed until now though." He pulled off his hat and Sirius stared.

It was hard not to.

I mean….

They were rams horns.

On Albus.

Albus had ram horns.

Under his hat…

Sirius slapped his hands to his mouth trying to stifle the abrupt laughter that spilled from it. Who would have thought? The picture of Aberforth sat on the desk he was sitting with his goat. It made the situation that much more hilarious in his opinion. Albus eyes followed his and he sighed.

"Yes I can see how this would make the situation comical, but let me tell it is not as much as you seem to make it."

"Albus you have horns. Your brother has a fascination with goats, how is this not funny."

Albus chuckled dryly. "Yes well, back to business. I must warn you that it would be prudent to stay in you r rooms after tomorrow night."

"Why?"

"Sirius maybe you will understand this. Harry is unaware of any creature blood and he will be upset, Remus may be happy with the change, but Severus who from the Prince side will come into his, these and many more people will not be very happy with you."

Sitting back and running his hand through his hair. He hadn't thought about that yet.

"How would they know it was me?"

Albus looked at him over his half moon glasses. Sirius sighed.

"Okay okay. I get it. Ill hide out." He stood to head out but turned around. "But Albus can I asked what creature you family has in it?"

"I am sure you will find eventually. Have a good night Sirius."

A/N Okay just a filler chap. it would have been more but I kind of forget who was what except for Dumbledore. So until next time I hope you like this. TTFN


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